One thing that seems to be on my mind more and more is making sure that I am carving time out to create.

The days seem to be overful. Squeezed to the gills like luggage on international flights.

The time that I do get are the scraps of the day. The hours where the moon spreads its quilted blanket of light over the land and sleep is hounding the corners of my eyelids.

These slivers of day are where I make my daily stand.. or hope to. Dragging myself through the crucible of creation in order to draw closer to God and to understand myself better.

I’m thankful for these moments because they are labor with a joyous ending of something created. I love looking back at the products of this labor even if others consider the result misshapen, broken, or useless.

I wonder if that is how God looks upon us. Never regretting it even if the results don’t quite live up to the original design.

I’m grateful.

Fly or Fall.

Wow.

The last time I wrote here I was looking at the ending of the year of our Lord 2020. And before you know it – here we are again, fast approaching the ending of another year.

And what a year it’s been.

It’s been a busy year and only slated to get busier.

Emotionally and spiritually its been both a growth year for sure. The person I am at the end of this year bears but a passing resemblance to the man who slumbered as the clock struck midnight of New Years.

Where do we start? How about the beginning.

January 2021 started with a bang. We were deep in COVID efforts at the health-systems I work at. I was volunteering at COVID vaccine clinics and working extra shifts as I could because we were also mid-pregnancy with our first baby girl together.

I was miserable as I tried to figure out how to deal with a pregnant partner and felt my needs fading into obscurity. Pregnancy is no walk in the park for the women who are busy growing the seed into a healthy baby, and from online forums and discussions with other dad’s – it’s no fun on the Father’s side of the fence either.

I was serving at church on the leadership team at the same time and could feel myself being overwhelmed by the logjam of responsibilities and everyday stressors.

We were also working through new house issues and trying to make sure that everything was set up by the time that baby hit the landing pad at the hospital.

We had two baby showers – one in the town where my wife was from and one in the city where we have lived for the last 5 years.

Financially I was also prepping for the celebration of our marriage which, technically, took place during the midst of COVID. All the extra shifts, I thought, put us in a good position for the wedding celebration (hint: I was wrong).

There was quite a bit on our plate this year. We spent the first half of the year running to make sure that we would be ready for the arrival of our daughter and the wedding that would serve as a celebration for our community.

All in all – a very interesting year:

• We had a baby! Baby O was born with no complications
• God really looked out for our family throughout the birth of our baby girl. I am just continually amazed at His faithfulness.
• We also had the much-delayed wedding celebration for our COVID wedding
  • It was much too expensive but a very good time was had by all so I guess that is what is important.
• Financially:
  • Student Loans were paused for around 18 months which gave us some, (i would like to say much appreciated, but the truth is it was much needed) – in fact – I don’t know how we could have accomplished everything we planned to do this year without it
  • I was able to go on paternity leave and really enjoy the middle of the summer with my wife and child
  • Perhaps a bad decision but we were able to put 50% down on a new mommy mobile and thus keep some cash flow which was helpful

I’m going to keep the list of major events to a minimum this year as another thing that has suffered is my free time and ability to write and create as much as I would like to.

I’m still working on figuring out what a realistic schedule looks like for me and every week it seems to change.

I do know that I do want to get more out of everyday than what I have been getting done and I’m looking forward to the growing that will probably need to take place in order for me to come to terms with the lack of sleep that will be required.

Fly or Fall.